Mr. Na and I will board a train tonight bound for Kiev, leaving Pa and Audri behind.  I’m very sad to leave them but I know they’ll follow in a few short days.  Pa needs to finish out the ten day waiting period and then get Audri’s new birth certificate, passport and visa.

I’ve come down with the flu and so life here in Kramatorsk has been pretty rough.  I’ve spent a few days in the apartment, taking massive doses of Ukrainian cold medicine and feeling sad I’m not able to go to the orphanage to spend some time with Audri.  But I know getting on a train and a plane with a bad cold is far worse than missing a few days, and I’d rather be on the mend before I travel.

You may wonder how it is I’m actually able to buy the right cold medicine, given that Mischa, our translator, is back in Kiev.  The woman who we’re renting the apartment from is a doctor at the orphanage, though she doesn’t speak any English.  So we’ve phoned Mischa to tell her our symptoms and she phoned the doctor who gave us a list of recommended medicine with doses.  Mischa then called me back and told me how to take the five different kinds of pills.  They’ve been helping with my aches and pains, but not necessarily my stuffy head.  Thank goodness Ukraine has Theraflu as well!

Mr. Na is looking forward to coming home.  He misses life back in Seattle–namely, his toys, his friends and his routine.  I don’t blame him.  I miss those things too.  But what I’m not looking forward to is coming home and facing Oatie’s death.   Our house will not be the same without her.

Once we pull in to Kiev tomorrow morning, Mr. Na and I will go to the American Embassy where I can start the visa paperwork for Audri.  After that, we’ll have the rest of the day to sightsee.  Then on Friday morning, we board the plane home.  I’ll write more once I make it to Kiev.

Well, we knew this would eventually happen: now that we’ve had court, everything has slowed to a complete stop.  Of course, we’re still visiting Audri every day, twice a day, at the orphanage; but life in Kramatorsk is beginning to take its toll on us.

Mr. Na has been a good sport throughout the trip–I’d say he’s even better than I predicted he’d be.  With all of the walking we do every day (two miles total, there and back to the orphanage) he hasn’t complained once.  But he’s been pretty defiant lately–which is definitely a characteristic of being six.  And every time we call him on it, he melts down and wails about how much he misses Oatie.  It’s gotten to the point now where we don’t’ believe he’s mourning the loss of our dog; he’s just using her death as an excuse to cry so he doesn’t get into trouble for things that he knows he shouldn’t be doing.  I know he’s homesick, and I know he does miss Oatie, but that doesn’t excuse him from being a total dork and lean on the asbestos-dust covered walls in the hallway like we told him not to do 8,000 times.

On the plus side, Mr. Na has assumed the role of big brother with grace.  Though Audri’s not quite ready to make the big leap and play with him, we’ve watched her emulate his play, and he’s been great at trying to get her interested in the things he does.  But they are clearly two different individuals.  Na is outgoing and very social.  When he walks into a room he wants everyone to know he’s there.  Audri is the exact opposite.  She is introverted and not very social at all. She prefers one-on-one attention and observes the world very quietly.  So Na doesn’t understand when we come to Audri’s Grouppa during visiting hours and she runs right past him to be scooped up into mine or Pa’s arms, and he gets pretty upset about it.  We’ve tried explaining that Audri just hasn’t warmed up to him yet, but he gets pretty flustered and pouts.  I keep telling him that pretty soon, she’ll be giving him so much attention, he’ll want her to leave him alone.

We haven’t really ventured out much more than our daily walks to and from the orphanage–stopping at the local grocery store along the way.  I’ve gone running twice so far but I’ve learned that it gets pretty hot here by 9:00 a.m., so if I don’t go earlier, I won’t enjoy it.

We’ve managed to find a local flea market that isn’t too far from our apartment building, but unfortunately we came close to closing time, so we weren’t able to see everything.  The market was set up like a public storage space where each vendor had one unit that they could close with a metal rolling door at the end of the day.  Vendors sold everything from clothes and shoes to food, toys, DVDs, cell phone accessories–you name it.  There was a large building adjacent to the outdoor market where people sold meat, fish, baked goods, fruit and vegetables.  Everything looked really good, but as I said, everyone was closing up shop and, quite honestly, walking around with a side of beef in my backpack seemed like a bad idea given the large quantity of stray dogs and cats roaming around!

By the time we finished our excursion to the flea market, it was time to go back and visit Audri.  Perhaps we’ll see more of Kramatorsk on foot in the coming days.  We certainly have the free time!

Court was only a matter of a few minutes–maybe a half an hour or so, but not much more than that.  In fact, we wound up waiting in a very hot, stinky hallway for over an hour ahead of time.  I didn’t eat much for breakfast so by the time the judge’s secretary called us in, I was starving and ever so grateful that we could sit in the courtroom.

Mr. Na was with us and I was so worried he’d just be this little wiggle worm throughout the session.  But he was actually pretty good.  I held his hand to keep him occupied but since most of the dialog was in Russian, translated into English for our benefit and then translated back into Russian, he couldn’t follow any of it.

The judge was flanked by two witnesses, which Pa thinks were other court clerks or secretaries who just happened to have little else to do but sit and watch three Americans sweat and fidget.  The judge was very nice, though…very straightforward.  She asked us why we wanted to adopt from Ukraine again and, interestingly enough, wouldn’t our son be insanely jealous of a new child?  We told her that he had been so good with her these past few days–playing with her and holding her– and sure, he’d be a little jealous, as all siblings can be, but he would always know that our love for both of them is equal and fair.

And really, that was that.  Within a few minutes, the judge congratulated us and I burst into tears!  Anna’s name was changed to Audri Anna and the judge’s official decision will be ready on Tuesday, August 19!

Meet Audri Anna

It’s official! We’re pleased to announce our beautiful new daughter, Audri Anna! Audri’s given name was “Anna” and so we added “Audri”.  She is 2.5 years-old and will be 3 on October 29, though she’s about the size of an 18 month-old. She’s 82 cm and 19 pounds (she’s tiny!). She doesn’t quiet yet talk but she babbles, walks and runs, and can feed herself. I’ll add more specifics about our short time in court and some pictures in another post, but I wanted to finally reveal our new Little Person’s secret identity. In a little over ten days, Pa will be on a train with Audri headed toward Kiev, where they’ll begin their journey home!

At first, when our driver took us to Mr. Na’s orphanage this morning, we thought he had made a mistake by taking us to the wrong one. You see, the driver we had in 2004 drove us in so many funky, different directions, we look back now and honestly, we think he did that on purpose to throw us off and make it seem like he was driving for miles and miles—to be able to charge more money.

So we had no idea that “Our Children” was located directly behind the courthouse in Donetsk, and in between calling our translator in Kiev and trying to explain our worries to the driver, we were headed back to Kramatorsk with Mr. Na practically in tears because he didn’t think he was going to get to see his orphanage. Finally, we connected with our driver vis a vie our translator (whom I will call Mischa from now on because she looks just like Mischa Barton) and within fifteen minutes, we were right back where we started from.

We walked up the flower-lined path to the front door where we were greeted by the same head nurse who was there in 2004. She said, in English, “Good morning to you, we’re so glad you’re here…” and the moment she locked eyes with Mr. Na, her prepared statement gave way to pure emotion. She was just in awe. She smoothed his hair and stroked his cheek and I could tell that not only was he remembered, he was truly missed.

We walked upstairs to a smaller room where the nurse pulled Mr. Na’s adoption announcement from a photo album. She thanked us for sending it and told us how pleased she was that we stayed in touch.

The nurse then led us to the director’s office who, upon seeing Mr. Na, showered him with the same affection. She motioned for us to sit down and I pulled out Mr. Na’s Kindergarten photo to give to her, which she enjoyed. She asked Mr. Na some direct questions (how old are you? What is your name now?) and she smiled when we told her that his given name was now his middle name.

Another translator came in and we were taken to the rooms that Mr. Na once occupied: a large, cheery classroom where three dozen children were eating their lunch. For a moment, Pa thought he was in a Haufbrau Haus because all the kids were toasting Mr. Na, saying “Prevyet!” It wouldn’t have been better if it had been rehearsed! That room opened up to a bedroom with rows of toddler beds, adorned with pink or blue Tweety Bird duvet covers. It was adorable (and I’m sorry our camera failed us at that moment).

We reminded the director that Mr. Na had been in the hospital with bronchitis when we first met him. She asked us if he had any additional problems with his health, to which I smiled and told her he’s been pretty healthy all this time.

The nurse told us that they rarely ever see the children after they’re adopted, and so for them, this was a huge treat. I told her we were in Kramatorsk, adopting a Little Person and that we couldn’t resist showing Mr. Na his origins. They asked me if we had disclosed Mr. Na’s history to him to which I replied “yes.”

And what was Mr. Na doing all the while? Lapping up the attention, most definitely, but he remained very quiet and shy. I knew he was happy to be there, but he didn’t remember anything or anyone. Just before we said our goodbyes, I told the head nurse why we called him Mr. Na and she exploded with laughter as I used his “gimmie gimmie” gesture as I said, “Na! Na! Na!” I told them he had gotten it all confused. Instead of saying “Diy!” he’d say “Na!” when he wanted something (which was, and still is, all the time!)

Our time at “Our Children” was brief but heartwarming. I’m so glad we made the trek. We enjoyed our little side trip to Donetsk and hope to return again some time.

It’s amazing how much a change of season can change one’s perspective. When we arrived in Donetsk earlier today, I couldn’t believe how much prettier it was than the last time I was there in the dead of winter. What’s more is that Pa and I never truly had the chance to get outside and walk around. We did, eventually, take the risk and navigate the icy streets, but always stayed on the main boulevard adjacent to our hotel and never really full experienced Donetsk.

Today, Donetsk was bustling–even for a Sunday. Families were walking along Pushkin Square which was one of the most beautiful gardenesque strolls in the city. I was convinced that Pushkin Square didn’t exist when we were in town in 2004 but I’ve been told otherwise.

The square had two huge playgrounds on which we let Mr. Na get his boogie out. Spending 90 minutes in a hot and sticky car from Kramatorsk to Donetsk wasn’t pleasant for him. Beautiful outdoor cafes and restaurants dotted the square and we chose a pizza place to have dinner before catching the soccer game at the stadium.

Pa had one mission today: find the Shakhtar Football Store! Turns out it was the last shop on Pushkin Square! It was a lot smaller than we imagined but that didn’t stop him from buying out the store. Would you believe he bought Shakhtar espresso cups? Finally, when he gathered up all his loot and took it to the counter to pay, they told him they wouldn’t accept visa! So he had to plunk down a huge chunk of cash…hopefully that won’t bite us back later when we’re scrambling to get a visa, a passport and airline tickets home!

We stayed at the Hotel Druzhba–the same hotel in which we took up residence in 2004. This time we chose a suite so we could give Mr. Na a separate room. They renovated the hotel and it looks a million times better than it did four years ago. Even the bathroom is quite lovely! After dinner and stowing Pa’s Shakhtar stash, we made our way to the Donetsk stadium for the match. I couldn’t get over how many people filled the stadium for a Sunday night–lots of die-hard fans. There were fans who even painted their face orange and white! We had amazing seats for the match–about five rows away from where the players enter the field and our tickets were only $4 apiece–completely unheard of back home!

As the sun dipped behind the stadium, throngs of fans began to line up alongside the players “tunnel” with the hope of grabbing an autograph or a after the match. These young athletes were definitely the toast of Donestk–and I wondered how many young boys dream of being on the football team.

Tomorrow, we visit Mr. Na’s orphanage! I’ll write an update afterwards!

Each day we go and visit Little Person brings us closer together. It’s gotten to the point now that Little Person makes eye contact with Papa and calls him Papa. He even taught Little Person to say “down” from his arms. What a difference a week makes!

I’m not bummed that Little Person isn’t that close to me just yet. First of all, because Papa’s a man—and the orphanage is filled with women caregivers, he’s a novelty. Plus, Little Person likes the feel of his beard. But more importantly, Pa has to fly home with Little Person by himself. And if there isn’t a trust there between them, it’s going to be a miserable 17 hours (10 to NY; two for layover; five more to Seattle) for both of them.

All kids living in an orphanage are driven by food, and Little Person is no exception. We bring a small package of round biscuits with us each day and this has really helped to form a bond. As Little Person gets ready to grab the cookie from out of our hands, we hold it up to our face so we can make eye contact, and while the cookie is being enjoyed, we sit Little Person in our laps, and hold rock and rub Little Person’s back. We’ve discovered that this was quite effective when we heard Little Person hum and coo.

I came to the orphanage about 45 minutes later than Pa and Na this morning, after my run (yay! I ran!) They were on the playground with Little Person who saw me and took a running leap into my arms. That just about turned me into goo.

Little by little, right?

A very dear friend of mine sent me mail today, asking me questions about the process and why Pa and Little Person will have to travel after Na and I leave. So I got to thinkin’ that maybe some readers would like me to elaborate about the process and why we need to go to court and why we need to wait after that. Pull up a chair and I’ll write in between cooking Mr. Na some fries.

We applied to court on Tuesday, which entailed going to the orphanage and saying “we would like to adopt Little Person.” They signed a document that said “If the judge agrees, we will release Little Person to PaNaMa.” The orphanage also included a document that had a summary of Little Person’s health. We went to the notary’s office and had official documents drawn up for the court that said “We want to adopt Little Person” and “We are aware of Little Person’s state of health.” There was an additional document that said “We have adopted a little boy in Ukraine before and we have the means to provide for two children.”

So we went to court and our translator talked to the judge and handed her those documents, along with a copy of our dossier so she could become familiar with PaNaMa. She penciled us in for next Wednesday at 10 a.m. to appear before her, where she will likely ask us questions about who we are and why we want to adopt. She might want to meet Mr. Na and ask him how he likes his Ma and Pa. She’ll likely tell us that Little Person is delayed and ask us if we understand that. Court lasts for about 10-15 minutes and last time, there was a plaintiff who kind of spoke on behalf of the state–but he didn’t say anything except “ok”. That was kinda weird.

Anyway, once the judge makes her decision, she will draw up the documents that will include Little Person’s new name and that LittlePerson is now our child.

Sounds good so far, right? Like–why can’t we swing by the orphanage, pick up Little Person and head home? Not so fast. The written “decision” has to rest fo 10 days which means we cannot take custody of Little Person just yet. During that time, a family member can come forward and claim Little Person and say they would like to take custody. This rarely happens, but it does happen. I’ve just read a case about two girls, 13 and 16 whose Aunt just came forward during the 10 day wait. We’re not worried because Little Person’s situation is verrrrry different…but it’s still law and the judge will not waive the ten days.

So..Na and I will fly home on August 15, just before the 10-day waiting period ends. We planned this because we knew Na would begin to get all bored and squirrelly. This is already starting to happen–especially with his dog dying. He’s very homesick, he craves his routines and his Legos and his friends…and personally, I don’t blame the kid. So we figured a month was going to be hard enough on him. Pa volunteered to stay here. We were worried this process would take a lot longer and if it did, Pa was going to go to Paris for a business trip for a week, in between all of this. But since the timeline has been pulled in for him, he won’t. Na and I don’t want to change our plane tickets because it costs $500 for each of us to do so…and like I said…this is rough on Na for being so far away from home.

We also planned for Pa and Little Person to come home later…by around August 28, which is the date on his plane ticket. But since the ten day waiting period ends on Sunday, August 16, he’ll be able to bring Little Person home later on that week. The Decision cannot be picked up on a Sunday and for some reason Monday’s out too. So the soonest would be Tuesday, August 18. Once the Decision is picked up, Pa swings by the orphanage, picks up Little One–they wave paka-paka-paka to a teary-eyed staff and he and Little Person travel to Donetsk to get Little Person’s birth certificate and passport. I can’t tell you how long those will take, but it would be a few days. Once he gets those two things, they take an overnight train to Kiev and then Little Person has a thorough examination at the Medical Center for the American Embassy. The next day, Pa and Little Person go to the embassy and apply for Little Person’s visa. They get it that afternoon and fly home the next day.

And that is what we call “Labor and Delivery” in the adoption world. It’s less physical but more emotional, I’d say.

I’m anxious to come home, too…especially since I have yet to tell my Mom about Oatie. I can’t. My Mom cannot handle the news alone (and I’m thankful she doesn’t have a computer!) The news is going to be pretty tough on her since she loved that dog with a vengenance. And I can’t stand it because I’m keeping it from her, and it’s killing me.

Yikes, gotta go…fries are burnin’ Curse this gas stove. It has only two settings: off and frickin’ hot!

I’m slightly embarrassed to admit that whenever I go away to Europe my chocoholism kicks-into high gear and I eat bars and bars of Milka or Kinder and jars of Nutella like it’s going out of style. I’ve had this habit since I was little, visiting my Uncle Ludwig’s garden, outside of Frankfurt, where I’d climb up his green apple tree and eat tart apples and Toblerone until I was sick. My mom found it to be an interesting way to regulate my digestion since one kind of canceled out the other.

Mr. Na has fallen into this habit too, and so our apartment here in Kramatorsk is filled with enough chocolate to get us through the month (At least, we think so; but there’s always more to be had.) And though the picture below does not include Milka or Kinder products, I thought I would share with you what other sorts of fun things we’ve been living on. If you haven’t yet been to Ukraine, you might be surprised by the products you’ll find. (By the way, you can click on each image to see a larger version!)

From left to right:
Sliced cheese – White, Orange, sharp, mild—you name it, it’s available.
Carmat Beer (a nice, refreshing pilsner)
Fanta Orange (not shown: Fanta Limon): I have two words to say to you—Beet Sugar. Maybe it sounds gross to you but it’s not Corn Syrup, so, in my opinion, the sodas here taste so much better. Coca Cola Light is also available.
Georgian Wine – this particular kind is red, dry and tasty.
Nescafe Express – Pa’s answer to Starbucks Double Shot
Nutella – There can be no alternative
Peanut Butter – honestly, not bad
Moloko – make sure you get that and not Keifer (sour yogurt).
Fitness Cereal – Think something like Special K (not shown: Honey Nut Cheerios)
Bon Aqua – bottled water. The bottles with light blue caps contain still water. Those with dark blue or green caps contain carbonated water.

I miss fresh fruit and vegetables and I’m too paranoid to buy much here unless it has a skin. The bananas here aren’t that great, but the citrus is tasty, as are the apricots. Speaking of which…there are apricot trees EVERYWHERE, which was kind of neat to see at first, until we inadvertantly started squishing through hundreds of fallen apricots as we made our trek to and from the orphanage.

We’re glad to be in a moderate-sized city where we can walk to one of two grocery stores nearby to pick up essentials. I’ve been going to the store every day to pick out something to make for dinner. So far, I’ve made chicken, pork and steak dishes that taste like they’re prepared in my own kitchen.

In addition to the supermarkets, there are also small “Magazines” located by the apartment complexes. They’re kinda like walk-up convenience stores, minus the Big Gulps. This one sells nothing but beer.

As we headed home from our visit with our dear, sweet Little Person this evening, Pa took a few pictures of our apartment complex and the surrounds. Here are a few to enjoy.